Here’s an article by Jeremy Soul of
Love Systems on how to sexually
escalate with women…
How to Progress Sexually With Women
Most men are interested in dating science because they want
to get better at interacting with beautiful women. Whether your
goal is to land a playboy model, or to start dating that cute
barista at Starbucks, you need to learn how to sexually
progress. Otherwise, you are likely to get the all too
familiar “let’s just be friends”.
Unfortunately, most men are afraid to act out on their sexual desires,
and the result is that they never push any boundaries with women.
This causes their game to plateau below their potential, leaving the
best opportunities to those willing to push the limits.
A good parallel is with an athlete trying to improve their skills. I have
a friend who white water kayaks, and he was telling me about his
adventures. If he never paddled rapids out of his comfort zone,
he would still be kayaking on dinky one foot waves.
Instead, he goes out with friends that he can learn from, and makes
sure he paddles a section of the river that is just a little bit out of
his comfort zone. That way he can improve his skills, while making
sure he doesn’t end up in the hospital. Now when he goes white
water kayaking, the dangers are real - but he takes constant,
yet small steps to take things up a notch.
Not surprisingly, the worst thing that has
happened to him is a pulled muscle.
In comparison, if you are too afraid to leave your comfort zone while
learning to meet women of quality, you will find that the quality of
women you approach is always low (i.e. your version of the dinky
one foot wave). It’s safe but not very fun, and you will never
Much like a kayaker challenging himself to find the perfect wave, you must
push the limits of sexual escalation before you can find the right balance.
Without ever pushing too far or too fast, you will never know if you are
pushing fast or far enough. When you don’t get the result you wanted
with a woman, make note of it, and then you adjust your approach
for next time.
A prerequisite for being able to progress with women is understanding that
they enjoy sex just as much as men - they just take a different route towards
sex. All one needs to do is pick up a copy of “ My Secret Garden” by Nancy Friday
to have this epiphany .The book is an evocative collection of fantasies sent to
Friday by normal, everyday women.
Now that I’ve covered some of the background on sexual escalation
I am going to provide some practical tips:
You Don’t Need “Big Moves”
When meeting women you should always be commanding a sexual presence.
Your two best tools for this are speech and body language. To start off, try
holding your initial handshake for a second longer than normal while keeping
eye contact. After that, try calibrating her to see if she is receptive to
your sexual overtones. When talking, keep a slow pace, measured
pace, and make sure to use pauses to add effect. Have fun with
this - you can even try ordering a coffee using sexual subtext.
By immediately creating a sexual presence and calibrating the situation you can
quickly screen for a women’s sexual openness. That way, if she doesn’t
respond you can quickly move on to something else.
Leave Them Better Than You Found Them
This is a principle I have always operated under, and I cannot stress this enough.
Don’t make a girl do something she doesn’t want to do - she should feel great
doing even the most “dirty” things. Make her feel like she is sharing in a fun,
exciting sexual adventure with you.
This also applies to setting the right frame for later on when you progress further.
If there is something you want to happen down the road, make her feel good
about it. Tell her “you would look so hot doing …” or “the most fun I ever
had with a woman was doing…” Those sorts of statements will create
positive associations with whatever sex act you are talking about.
Most women derive pleasure from pleasing someone they like. Let her know
you are enjoying whatever she is doing to/for/with you. Tell her “I love the
way you do that” or “you look really sexy doing that”. It is important to be
supportive of a woman as you progress with her. Men that express their
sexual desires without any regard for the woman are considered to be
sleazy, and you don’t want to fall into that group. This sort of
disregard for women is also a good way of guaranteeing there
will be no repeat performances.
Creating the Right State of Mind
To successfully progress with a woman, you must demonstrate to her
that you want her, but that you do not need her. This is another
example of the importance of finding the right balance. If you
pretend you are not interested whatsoever, she will move
on to someone else, or just peg you as a friend.
However, if you act needy towards her, she will be turned off.
Beautiful women like a little bit of a challenge. That is where
wanting comes in - make it clear that while you are
interested in her sexually, you live in a state of
abundance, and will meet your needs somewhere
else if she doesn’t respond to you. Basically,
you must always be willing to walk away.
Finally, I know I’ve written about this before, but it is essential to remember
that this is all a part of one great learning process. There is no such thing
as rejection - only feedback. As you start to push the limits of sexual
escalation, keep track of how women are reacting. Be confident,
have fun with it, and keep escalating faster and further until
you have to bring things down a notch - that is when you
know you are starting to approach the right balance in
To find out more information on turning an interaction more sexual, check out
this audio download by Love Systems. The first 10 minutes are free.