Do you ever try to approach a set but you stall and get nervous and the excuse-machine in your head kicks in? It is approach anxiety and it is one of the biggest problems I find myself having.
The most widely known weapon to eliminate it is the 3-second rule. As soon as you look at a set you have three seconds to approach the set.
The 3-second rule is good in theory, but I find myself needing an extra push. That push is reciting a phrase from the movie “ Risky Business” that shuts off the excuse-generator in my head immediately and brings back my confidence.
That phrase is “What the Fuck”
In the movie Joel has a discussion with Miles that goes like this:
You have anxiety approaching so you get nervous and start making excuses. You are concerned with jeopardizing your future and your future chances when in fact you’re actually keeping yourself from having a more successful future.
It is hard to get better with women if you do not approach. You have very little chance with the girl if you do not approach the set she is in.
The next time you find yourself with approach anxiety, give yourself freedom:
Tell yourself “What the fuck” and go open the set!
If you can’t say it, you can’t do it!
I recommend the Art of Approaching for more info on overcoming approach anxiety.