By David DeAngelo
Author of best-selling “Double Your Dating” ebook
I’ve said it a bazillion times… great women don’t see a man as potential “relationship material” based on his looks, money, or cheesy pick-up lines.
When it comes to figuring out if a particular guy might be “Mr. Right,” the first thing most women look for are sure signs of CONFIDENCE. More specifically, the 4 unmistakable, magnetic signals that confident men send a woman the moment they meet her.
Naturally, a man doesn’t need to show them all to get the attention of a great woman… but if he manages to show her just a few, chances drastically increase that she’ll start “feeling it” for him.
So, without further delay, here come the 4 sure signs of confidence that every great woman looks for in a man:
Listen… “easy-going” does NOT mean being so laid back when you first meet a woman that you’re practically asleep. It also doesn’t mean putting up with any kind of rude or inappropriate behavior.
It means handling the opinions, pressures, and attitudes of others with grace, and coming across as comfortable in your own skin. Even your body language communicates it… a confident man will literally, physically “lay back,” leaning back while keeping his body open and facing forward when conversing.
A confident “real man” also doesn’t obsess about what other people think or do. He doesn’t take it as an insult if someone doesn’t like him, or disagrees with him. Above all, he isn’t needy, clingy, and always trying to be the center of attention.
Basically, this “easy-going” attitude signals a woman that a man is the leader of his own life… everyone else do what they may.
It’s true, a woman will never decide that a man might be “Mr. Right” just because he looks like Brad Pitt… but rest assured she’ll INSTANTLY RULE HIM OUT if he doesn’t look “right”… caring about himself enough to attend to the basics of appearance which communicate a positive, healthy self-image.
Again, this doesn’t mean that a man has to buy trendy clothes… wear a “scent”… or look like an obsessive gym rat.
It DOES mean that he needs to master the basics of good grooming and hygiene. Because, if a man doesn’t have it together enough to attend to his own needs, a quality woman knows right away that there’s NO WAY he can possibly attend to hers.
By the way… this also means being savvy enough to avoid “extremes” in appearance. When first meeting a woman, I recommend dressing neutrally and neatly, neither coming across as a stuffy “suit” or a sandal hound.
Finally: coming across as “put together” means communicating confidence about who you are on the INSIDE as well. You can do it by being able to carry on an interesting conversation about music… food… culture… whatever. Becoming a good conversationalist is a sure sign that you have it all together… that you’re in a healthy, curious, CONFIDENT state of mind.
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This is a big one…
Like I always say, any “jerk” can act cocky with a woman… but coming across as CONFIDENT requires something else: the ability to control what you say and do so that you never come across as “above” anyone else.
Sure, a man can act cocky… as long as he’s makes sure that it’s FUNNY (since arrogance without humor equals “jerk” every time). A truly confident man makes fun of HIMSELF above all others, and never “nitpicks” or tries to hurt another person’s feelings.
For example, it’s okay to look across the room at some other guy and say something cocky like, “Look at that guy’s facial hair… I think 1975 wants it back.” But ONLY if he’s HUMBLE enough to add a comment like, “Believe me, I know… mine was just like it.”
File this one under “No-Brainer”… a great sense of humor is the most instant, obvious, magnetic force that makes a woman sense a man’s CONFIDENCE… and therefore feel the first sparks of ATTRACTION for him.
That’s why I suggest that guys do whatever they can to cultivate a “comic sensibility”, even it means just reading a few books about the theory and structure of comedy and timing.
I also recommend checking out cutting-edge humor sites like “Funny Or Die” and “The Onion,” or just watching Saturday Night live to understand what’s hip and funny TODAY… because it’s all guaranteed to change and become “lame” TOMORROW.
Add it all up, and the message is clear:
While most men waste time trying to impress women by acting “tough” or “dominant,”… the signs of confidence great women look for are much more subtle… and MUCH more easily achieved.
By focusing on “broadcasting” the four TRUE signs of magnetic “real-man” confidence… the kind of women you want to meet will start sensing that YOU just might be “Mr. Right.”