The Last American Virgin Movie Review

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Every Friday I will do a review of a chick flick I hate or a dick flick I love. If you have any recommendations for movies for me to review, let me know.

The Last American Virgin Lemon Popsicle DVD Cover I cannot stress how much I love this movie! If you are looking for a dick flick that sticks to its guns to the end rather than turning into a chick flick 45 minutes into it like The Wedding Crashers or Old School then look no further. If you are looking for a movie where the dorky “nice guy” friend gets shit on rather than getting the girl like in every other movie here it is!

***WARNING: MAJOR SPOILERS!!!***

The movie is about three teenage friends. There is one fat guy for comedy relief, there is one “natural” alpha-male and there is a wussy AFC. The AFC meets a girl who is new to the area and gets a crush on her. He kisses her ass and tries to give her stuff to gain her affection. It doesn’t work.

He goes to a party with his two friends and his alpha-male friend starts making out with the girl. He turns into a jealous drunken loser. He really flips out later when his buddy brags to him that he popped the girls cherry.

The alpha-male ends up knocking the girl up and then dumps her. While he goes skiing with a new girl, the AFC takes the knocked up girl to get an abortion. He waits on her hand and foot while she is recovering and they share a loving night together and kiss.

The AFC looks too much into the momentary affection and thinks they are now boyfriend/girlfriend. He spends a shit load of money on a piece of engraved jewelry to give to her.

Oh no! Is the girl going to realize her mistake of dating an asshole and fall for the “nice guy”? For once in my cinema watching life I can proudly declare FUCK NO! What happens next can only be declared as the most kick ass ending to a movie EVER.

When he goes to a party to give her his gift he finds her there making out with the alpha-male! BAAAAAZING!!! They ad salt to the wounds by telling the AFC that they are now back together.

The movie ends with the AFC driving home by himself crying his eyes out like a little bitch!!! BRAVO!!!

*** End of Spoilers ***

Half of the movie is full of Porky’s and American Pie like antics. The other half delves into the teenage angst and relationship area. There is a lot of sex and nudity in it.
For being 25 years old, I think the movie has aged quite well. If you like 80’s music, this movie has some of the best in it including U2, The Police, The Cars and Journey songs.

The movie is actually a remake of a cult 1978 Israeli movie called “Eskimo Limon” (or “Lemon Popsicle” in English). That movie was so popular that it spawned eight sequels with a ninth currently in production.

So why did it flop so bad in the US? I think the name was a poor choice but more importantly it was too ‘real’ for American women and AFC’s to handle. I think 90% of the population likes cheesy chick flicks with puppy dog and ice cream endings. It makes women feel better about themselves and AFC’s think there is still a hope that some hot girl will actually come around and fall for a nice guy loser like themselves. I doubt most people were like me and clapped, smiled and cheered to the ending of this movie.

Based on the reviews for it at Amazon it seems that people are starting to learn to appreciate a movie as brutally honest as this one. Hollywood take note: we need more movies today like this one!

Buy it and watch it!




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Comments: 3 comments

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  • Bobby Rio
    November 17th, 2007 at 11:39 pm

    If you want a good 80’s Dick Flick. Check out the movie Hot Dog: The Movie. If you never seen go to Amazon and check it out. Skiing, one liners, and nudity!

  • Mack Tight
    November 18th, 2007 at 4:55 pm

    I actually bought that one too. There is a South Park episode called “Asspen” that is loosely based on that movie.

  • Renegade
    July 11th, 2010 at 11:14 pm

    Towards the ending I was expecting the girl to fall in love with the “geek” and some Disney style ending. I was empathetic with the AFC all throughout, I did a lot of the shit he did. Then when the surprise ending happened, I was laughing LOL. I felt better about myself cause although I was a loser with women, at least I didn’t spend 250 dollars for an abortion, and 80 bucks for a locket.

    Moral of this movie is; DON’T BE THIS GUY LOL.

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