What To Do When She Says “No”
by Stephen Nash
It is bound to happen. That one word we all do not want to hear from a woman we’re dating….
If you decide to take charge of your life, and get your dating challenges handled, guess what?
You are bound to make mistakes.
You are also bound to hear the most dreaded word that could ever emit from the beautiful lips of a woman:
It would be impossible to outline a to-do list for each and every time she might say “no” to you, OK?
But, there is one basic rule for dealing with this objection and it is very important to abide by this rule.
Want to know what it is?
Well, when she says no to you, you better agree with her!
If you are about to kiss her, don’t.
If you are about to touch her, don’t.
If you are about to do anything intimate, and she says no, don’t do it.
Now, you might be thinking - but, is that it?
It’s a closed door forever?
I am NEVER to go for “it” again?
Yes, she is uttering the word “no” to you, but what she is really saying is “not yet” or “I am not comfortable with you yet”.
Women are all different and have different time schedules for everything.
One woman may want to kiss you from the moment she sees you, while another may not want to feel your lips on hers until the second date.
If she says “no”, agree with her, and back up a bit - give her some space and show her that you are sensitive to her comfort level.
She probably needs more time with you, to learn more about you so she feels more connected to you and trusting that you won’t push her and make her uncomfortable.
So, backup a bit, convey your personality a bit more, convey some stories about your life, lighten the mood with your sense of humor (*key*)…and the next time you try to kiss her, she is more likely to be open to it.
A number of months ago, I was out with a woman and we were watching some fireworks by the Hudson River.
The moment was intimate and romantic - primetime for a kiss, or so I thought.
When I moved to kiss her, she moved her head back and giggled a bit. She wasn’t “ready” for that yet…
So, instead of getting flustered or angry, I just smiled, stroked her hair and whispered “OK”. I then kept the mood gentle and romantic by changing the subject slightly and told a story about watching fireworks when I was a kid.
When it was time to leave, I took her by the hand and led her back to the car.
Instead of waiting until the end of the date for the kiss, I paused underneath an old lamp to admire the view of the river one last time.
I pulled her into me, and this time, she was ready.
We shared a nice kiss, and then soon left to go home.
She told me later that the way I handled her “rejection” caused her to feel more attracted and comfortable with me.
I didn’t freak out, or get shell-shocked by taking it personally.
Rejection is not always rejection…it is very often, a “not yet” signal.
Thus, I was able to kiss her with no resistance on my second try.
To summarize, if she says “no”, don’t get discouraged, down or angry.
Just take it as information about how comfortable she is feeling with you.
Keep a positive frame of mind, and keep having fun with her. You can use this moment as a way to show her that you are someone she can trust, and that you can handle a challenge without loosing your cool.
Ultimately, if she continues saying “no”, guess what? She is probably not interested, or not attracted to you.
Probably best to cut your losses then and move on.
Last but not least - “no” means “no” - it does not mean “if”, “and” or “but” and certainly not “yes”.
So, respect her wishes and comply…don’t ever push or force ANYTHING…EVER…OK?
That was just my public service announcement…
Have you read my “kiss test” yet?
It’s a sure-fire way to know if she’s truly ready for your “move” yet…so you can avoid her ever saying “no” in the first place.
It’s on page 55 in my ebook…
If you haven’t purchased my ebook “How To Get A Girlfriend” yet, what on earth are you waiting for!?
It is the BEST source of practical, easy-to-learn information on dating and relationships currently on the market - period.
It also comes with a 7-day fr.ee trial.
Just click this link and be reading it in 5 minutes.
But, only download it if you are serious about improving your dating life.
It’s a meager investment, but it does challenge you to grow out of your comfort zone…
Consider yourself warned.